Finance for non-financial Managers - Section1: Global Financial systems
A NAMIBIAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You make biltong...
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
· You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
A SOUTH AFRICAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You go on strike because you want three cows.
· They get stolen, so you blame the previous regime' and steal someone else's cows and shoot their owner.
A ZIMBABWEAN CORPORATION
· A farmer has two cows.
· You take over his farm, eat both cows and wait for the international community to supply more.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You re-design them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
· You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
A BRITISH CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· Both are mad.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You pray to them for food.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
· You break for lunch.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You count them and learn you have five cows.
· You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
· You count them again and learn you have 12 cows.
· You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
A SWISS CORPORATION
· You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
· You charge others for storing them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· You have 300 people milking them.
· You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.
AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
· You have two cows.
· The one on the left is kinda cute...
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